Fuck Fox News

This just in. Breaking news. FOX News is a piece of shit. They know they suck, but seemingly enjoy continuing to push further away from reality and balanced reporting to thrust their authoratatvie bullshit mockery of news directly to our faces. The next 4+ years will just be them bitching and trying to find a slight fault in an already terrible mess we are in while denying all fault from the last 8 years. How they honestly thought a dinosaur teamed up with a ditsy out of touch power hungry balless bulldog could run our country is mind numbingly insane. Not to mention the hopeful first lady to be who was basically bought from a Toys R Us store and thrusted into real life from right out of a Malibu Barbie box, complete with millions of dollars and and the Malibu Barbie House set. At least while America struggles to find its identity amid this colossal mess we get to listen to the wonderful reporting stylings of the FOX News gang, giving us their wonderful take on everything.

Oh, Faux News. No wonder why the French don’t take us seriously and criticize everything we do. This is the crap they get streaming to their TV screens and what they think of when they describe America. Fake, over-hyped, fear-mongering, agenda-driven lies and twisting of words. They love to drag out the scariest most over-blown stories for as long as they can to get ratings and spark a cause for concern in people to instill a need of staying glued to the television 24/7 to learn more about nonsensical banter. Then when the story finally has been blown out of proportion and has served their agenda or lost edginess they move on to the next trivial subject. Fair and balanced???!!!! More like, “What I tell you is right and one sided so believe it no matter what I say.” Just drop the act already and I hate to sound so liberal, but you’re all a fucking joke!

Okay, I want to start the bashing with the king of bashing and talking over anybody who happens to disagree…Bill O’Reilly. Here is what you can expect from him on a daily basis (O’Reilly Talking “Points”). You have to love the use of non-cited, obviously well spun statistics to prove a very lame point and then follow it up with trashing somebody over unproven allegations. Here is a fun excerpt, “The president is a sincere man. I believe that. But I do not believe he truly understands evil, and his liberal policies will have a very hard time containing it. Wait and see.” Yes Bill, I know what you mean, it takes someone evil to truly understand evil, like yourself. Even if you say Bush understood evil he was still far too dumb to heed caution and do anything about it. Here is one of the many times Bill O’Reilly has been caught bending truth and got called out (O’Reilly uses Nazi propaganda to defend torture, attack Obama). I could go on and on with Bill, but I don’t want to leave out some of the other wonderful supporting cast at FOX News.

Rupert Murdoch, the kingpin crook behind it all. He wants the Internet to cost more money to consumers and is constantly on record speaking out against the trend of free news because it threatens one of his many enterprises. He actually thinks it is wise to make people pay almost 200 a year to view the wall street journal online only because a little iPhone app has sparked interest and he wants to find a way to profit. I’ll just not mention how he has been pushing his conservative agenda through the FOX News media outlet and will move on continuing to ignore him and his billions of dollars. He’s a good example of money not buying happiness.

Then if you really have no life and are lame as shit you will tune in for FOX After Dark and listen to the stupidest people talk about nothing until your brain wants to explode and drift off to a wonderful slumber full of dreams infected by swine flu, terrorists, waterboarding, and excessive trash.

Don’t get me wrong. Other channels have their faults too. CNN has Nancy Grace (how has FOX not stolen her yet is amazing), MSNBC has the need to always bash everyone and pick fights, BET is infatuated with everything Obama (understandably so), and Comedy Central loves making fun of everyone and everything on the Daily Show and Colbert Report. But if you really want to find some news I still don’t know how you can rely on FOX. Sean Hannity is a tool and I gotta give props to Alan Colmes for somehow sticking in there so long. You cna tell Colmes has taken a beating with his skeleton like figure he has basically been sucked dry of all life from being on that show for 13 years! Alan remains the only bit of support to FOX’s claim of fairness and balance. Glen Beck actually thinks he is helping the nation and his lies are beneficial and acceptable becuase they have seemingly good intentions. He is the sleeper in the group and is really their sharpest tool for pushing their conservative propoganda. Greta van Susteren is just plain ugly. I can’t even stand to watch her let alone try to listen to her. Geraldo Rivera is a joke and has gone on for far too long. He can somehow take both a liberal and a conservative take yet always appear and sound like a made up cartoon character.

The only source for news is the internet, after you can sort through the filth of course. Maybe I should just use the Onion for my news from now on. I am not attacking FOX News purely becuase of liberal vs conservative here. This is a matter of outright biased vs non biased or steaming pile of shit vs something with a hint of solid information. I can only hope in time FOX News will eventually collapse their own tent, tip their canoe, and be left stranded, unwatched, and outcasted. I challenge all of you to try and rely on FOX News for your information for an entire week (if you can last that long) and see if you don’t feel the same way I do.